Perception

Perspective.
It's all about perspective.
People, I mean.

I judge people. I don't mean to, really.
I'm a naturally perceptive person. That sounds like an excuse, but it's not meant to be. I just find it easy to see people. Predict their actions. Reading people is like second nature to me.

Maybe that's why my head feels so fucked with. When you're not given all the basics of the material, there's no way that you be correct.

It's not like it should matter. I know it shouldn't, I do: the reason for the Shift is so trivial.

Regardless, the Shift has happened, and I still can't properly wrap my head around the fact that there was a shift at all. I can't shake the image of what I was so positively sure that I knew. I can't shake the fact that I was so completely and entirely wrong, because I still want to cling to what I thought I knew. It was warm, and reassuring, and overwhelmingly benevolent.

But this one, tiny, insignificant puzzle piece changes the picture entirely.

Here's something that I've known all along:

Nobody is the same in everyone's mind. To every single person, the material that they've been given makes up who they see you as. You are someone different to everyone.

Even going into everything knowing that, it's hard for me to realize there are so many more levels to people than I see.

I'm not living in a storybook world. These characters aren't characters: They're people. They can't be defined by certain traits or always be expected to act the same way. Real people are inconsistent, each with their own pounds of emotional baggage and multiple dimensions.

I am way, way over my head, and this is no longer an ocean I want to swim in.